Kicks!

So I started feeling the butterflies that everyone describes about a week or so ago but it wasn't often and I was afraid to really say that it was the baby but I am pretty sure it was now. On Thursday (maybe Wednesday) of last week (17 weeks) I began to feel actual little "kicks" down low in my belly and thought, maybe it's just gas (lol) but I have been feeling them pretty frequently now and especially when I'm sort of hunched over sitting at my desk or something...sort of like the baby is saying "Get off of me!". haha. I am so excited to finally feel movement and I can't wait until it's a lot more and when Jonathan can feel it too....so cool!

Drum Roll Please :)

I have been asked to post some belly pictures so here's one that is terrible quality from my webcam, lol. My other cameras were both dead so that's the best I could do :). 

Anyway, I'll be 17 weeks tomorrow! WooHoo. I am very excited to find out what this baby is and I don't know if I can wait until the 31st!!! I am feeling pretty good, just really hungry, lol. I am hungry all the time and we just got an e-mail at work this week saying that we can't eat at our desks anymore so I'm in the break room a lot! Oh...I'm not sure if I said this before or not but there are 3 people who are pregnant at work - Renee, Holly and myself. Holly is due in May and Renee is in labor as we speak! We have been getting updates all day on her and at 5:00 she was fully dilated so there may be a baby by now, I don't know! She's having a baby girl and Holly is also having a baby girl which she is naming Macie Rae so everybody says that I'm having a girl because it's the year of the girls, so we'll see :). 

Warning...whine fest below

Ok, so this is just a warning...this will be a very whiny post! LOL.

I have always wanted to be a stay-at-home or work-at-home Mom but I've known since we got married that that was probably not going to be possible and it sucks! I would love for my PaperMePretty business to thrive and I'm doing all I can to help it along but I don't foresee it turning enough profit in the next 5-6 months to allow me to only work on that and not have a job outside of the home. I know that I'd go crazy not doing something but I've worked consistantly since I was 14 and I'd love to have a nice break where I didn't have to work outside of the home and all I had to do was watch my baby grow up and go to play dates, play groups, the park, etc and then work from my home on my own designs. Don't get me wrong, I love the company I work for, that's not the issue...it's just that why would anyone want someone else watching their baby while they went to work? Well anyway, this dream I'm speaking off isn't possible right now in our lives for many reasons but mainly vehicle payments and insurance so unless Jonathan can start riding a horse to work (he'd love that) and they would make carseats for horse buggies, I don't foresee this being even the slightest possibility at this moment in time.

So...I finally decided to break down and go on some daycare tours here in the County...if you ever want to cry doing something try being 4 months pregnant, hormonal, wanting so badly to stay at home with your baby and HAVING to go look at daycares...its sucks! I went to Generations because it's supposed to be the Cadillac of daycares in Ashe and while it was very nice I was not impressed AT ALL with the baby room. It was the size of my office at work (very small) with 2 teachers and 6 or 8 babies and the babies didn't have anywhere to go....okay okay, I know...where do babies need to go? These babies were starting to crawl/walk and they had nowhere at all to do that so I left VERY upset and sobbed the entire day, lol. I then went to Learning Thru Play Too and I felt much better about their facilities. I knew most of the teachers and one of them I've known for years and I wouldn't think twice about her watching my baby so I just had an all around better experience there. The baby room was MUCH larger than the one at Generations and then the next room was also fairly big and I felt like the babies were getting plenty of attention so that was great. Also, my mother-in-law will be moving her office up to that same building so she could go check on the baby anytime I/she wanted and I can get there within 2 minutes if I needed to and hopefully I can go up there on my lunch breaks to nurse the baby (hopefully). So anyway, I guess we'll end up going with that daycare...it's really the only one I would consider, I've seen some others and I wasn't impressed. :/

Well anyway I hate the thoughts of even having to do daycare but I'm much more okay with that than I would be to leave "it" with a random old lady who had 6 other kids to watch and couldn't give mine the attention "it" needed...so I guess daycare is the lesser of two evils in my eyes, everybody's different. The cost is another sucky part about daycare but I can afford that much more than I can afford to not bring in an income and stay at home so I guess that part I just have to live with.

See told ya it was whiny :). I plan to post a belly pic and do another update tonight so stay tuned!